saturdaes` yawn!

dis pic very nice hor.. so sad oso =( haha. nothin much 2 rite bah! but i quite happi 2dae lar.. got new mouthpiece n donno wats dat call.. ligerche donno wat. haha! ^-^v band keep playin folklore for sectionals. mr neo sae clarinet section donno doin wat durin sectionals. practising lar. still got wat? but donno y wen he ask us 2 plae clarinets alone we all cannot de. durin sectionals we can plae de lor. haa! hmm.. durin sectionals so rubbish! very funni sia~ oso donno where 2 start frm. nvm.. after band went for lunch wif mei qing. haha! den wp they all went 2 watch sisters. i din watch lar.. cos many ppl tell me not nice.. n i had 2 meet my mother de.. so wat was e endin!? haha! i went home alone as mich din come.. den slept like pig for 3 or 4 hours at home lor. told my mother i too tired 2 go out liao. band practically drained my energy sia dats y i'll feel so tired mah! n den on my process of slpin i 4got 2 put my hp as silent mode.. but donno y i wake up got msg! but wen slpin i din heard my msg alert tone.. somemore i put e level quite loud one. wah~ i guess i'm someone hu will turn deaf oso wen slpin -_-` haha

... =]

jus decided 2 rite another post. donno y.. jus feel like writin since its a fridae n i'm kinda free dat is.. jus feel like goin back 2 e past sia. in pri-sch. life so much simpler n better =) these daes.. i seemed to be lost 4 words. drowned by myself. even unhappiness towards others vanished in me. i donno. feel no point in gettin all worked up n pissed by others. life is gettin nowhere. haii.. depression? happiness/sadness. all results 2 e same ting. feelings. emotions? everyting above us is jus a mask. i realize ppl nowadaes includin me has multiple masks. hide awae frm e true self. it doesn't matters anywae. i've seen 2 much of dis now.. i hate it myself. but hopelessly, whu would realize? all my actions r e opposite of me nowadaes. saggitaurius r known as happy-go-lucky n optimistic.. n e horoscope is realli correct in a fact. i used 2 be like dat. a true saggitaurian.. lol. but i don even hav a idea wat i'm realli thinkin or feeling. maked by another me. i wonders if i'm tryin 2 isolate myself sumtimes. okie.. maybe not relli. theres still a part of me hu wans 2 go on n be as normal. but my life has chged. relli chg.. i noe it myself.. i found e chg in others myself.. i chged my attitude too. maybe made it worse? hah. for better or worse.. i'm still me, jus dat same me.. realized i'm seriously alone u noe? alone in myself. alone in my heart. alone in my mind. its jus me.. n still me. pour out troubles 2 myself. it takes a great effort 2 even truely smile nowadaes. i don tink i had truely smiled dis few daes. smiling is jus an outerior picture of u. u can smile. but wat happens wen u smile yet in u.. u r actually cryin. theres jus too much of a fake image on e outside. well, i donno. -vOicewithin

finally fridae. bad one?

haii. s2pid dae again.. its bad fridae huh i guess? not exactly bad 4 me.. 4 some ppl. haii.. my chinese test was averagely alrite i guess. should be able 2 pass dou i left 1 3 marks question empty. whoa. =) n den came geog test. donno wth i was writing. but nvm =D i cant strive in geog one.. den after sch i had 2 take a chi spellin retest.. n den go meet sarah somewhere -_-`.. but couldn't find her at 1st. den i kinda "alone" liao. but nvm i'll get used 2 it soon. hmm.. n i asked natalie they all 2 wait. guess they 2 kan cheong. donno wat big buiness nat had dat she had to RUSH home. n seriously.. shes e only one hu wan 2 rush home mah. den e rest ask her wait a while.. in e end she wan go home wif vera 1st. quite pang sei lar.. but i no rights 2 sae anyting bout her lor.. but i was quite ((donno wat 2 sae)) wen she said she wanted 2 wait 4 me at e piano area while i go staffroom find sarah.. yet wen i at spiral staircase there ramya had 2 convey her msg 2 me dat she has left as she wanna go home.. whee! i was simply feeling GREAT. haha.. aniwae i had my chinese spelling retest n got 80 marks. a1 ardy lar.. cannot expect so much frm me one.. lol, tomorrow got band.. anywae i donno how 2 sideread dat well.. haii.. donno wat will happen 2 e 3rd clarinets. sure no sound come out? hah. den tuesdae practically all e 2/5 ppl wun be able 2 make it 4 band.. got e ndp perf rehearsal. donno wat will happen 2 3rd clarinet.. left vanessa n min min onli. haii =/ syu n me will be gone.. gone frm misery = haha.. hmm.. listening 2 intuition by jewel.. verii nice song =) haii. ppl r often lonely cos they build walls instead of bridges. another of my fav. quotes..

-_-`

hmm.. i'm thinkin whether 2 rite dis post anot. maybe not? haha. kinda felt more isolated den ever 2dae. donno y. maybe jus cannot make it lor. still needa studiee for chinese n geog test tomorrow. haii` wth? lol. sth happen so unexpectedly 2dae! can u imagine me not bringin my art sketchbook! Lol! SOO freaking malu!! but e ting is i'm not malu cos i din bring e sketchbook! but cos of mr goh n my class. din bring sketchbook mus rite dwn in handbook one mah.. den i was like jus take out n giv mr goh rite wateva he wans lor. haha! n den he said 2 e whole class "i noe amanda is a good gal but still mus rite dwn in handbook if nvr bring" WALIEW!! haii! n den e whole class was like sian diao! cos.. erm.. i NOT good gal mah! :s den imran still sae wat "she got scold bad words sia" i like xia dao! wth he wan! whole class sayin me lor! lol!! so 1ST time man.. den mr goh like giv some s2pid expression on his face! liewww.. like wat onli de lar.. how can my class sae me is bad gal?! haha. n den hor.. s2pid sia.. damn pissed off wif kx or muru lar.. or mayb both of em. 2 tink they hav e cheek 2 rite zhuen love me in zhuen's sketchbook? as dou ppl will believe. me n zhuen close as sista n brudder 2 be called "lovers" lor? sian diao.. n e worse ting is.. y does kx rite dat? i mean i all along tot he quite "good" in a sense de lor. den 2dae he liddat.. i guess dat chg my view of him completely le lar? den murugesh damn fcuk one lar.. he cannot chg his behaviour ardy lar i guess? once a jerk. forever a jerk.

diaon! :p

writing another post 2dae! =) listening to the song entitled a song for a lady. dat songs nvr fail to make me feel sad. aniwae e song is sad =( sob~ 2dae i was rather malu again. flag raising lar! but dis time huiyi slower den me =s wat is dis huh.. flag raising ocmpeition 4 e slowest flag? ((lol)) e song finish i was like still pullin e flag! argh! mus improve on e skills nxt wednesdae i guess. 2dae many students frm su zhou[china] came 2 our sch! our class onli got one! and e partner is none other den HUIYI! lol! 2dae i quite "happi" in a sense.. got 2 meet my pri-sch fren aka xiao bai aka shelby!! dats her real name. shelby~ nice huh? =x few months din c her le.. so after sch i went to take neoprints wif her! shes so cute.. she still has dat baby face on her lor.. hah! after scannin e pics i'll post it up! =p whee!~woah.. how do u noe if u have like someone.. dats wat mich asked me. well.. i donno how she tinks bout dis de.. but she like so many ppl =.=~ sian diao huh.. so 2 me. defination of likin someone.. u will look out 4 e person 2 make sure he/she is happie.. den u urself will feel veri contented jus 2 do dat den wen u c him/her sad.. u will feel e same sadness in u oso.. cos liddat lar!!! lol~ rubbish lar me.. english 2 lousy? hah.. goin 2 malaysia on national dae leh.. =s quite s2pid hor.. national dae i go malaysia for wat.. should stay in singapore 2 celebrate mah! haish~ but of cos mus go malaysia.. my uncle organized us go malaysia de.. den stay there de chalet.. should be quite shuang lar, well i donno~ mite miss my frens in singapore =x LOL~aldou i'm goin malaysia for 1 nite nia~ s2pid siaaa. x-peace!-x

yawns

its like 1 hour after i got home frm band 2dae. tired sia, got new music to play.. Overture Jubiloso and Folklore. Quite difficult lar.. i mean 1st time sidereading sure diff mah =x dats y i brought home mah clarinet to practise lor! dou i seriously doubt whether i would hav time 2 prac anot. haii.. theres dis person hu add me in msn frm frenster.. actually i don relli like. i guess i'll jus block him since i don even noe him. hate ppl hu tried 2 chat wif me wen i don even noe em.. n ESPECIALLY if dat person somemore ask u 4 intro.. so slappin. haha.. nOw wat? he still ask 4 hieight weight wat sai.. i block him liao lar. freak sia dis type of ppl.. pui! >.< sai ="s">WTH. haha.. added lots of stuffs 2 mah blog oso? nicer mah? (^-^) hoho.. jk. i guess i go do math liao.. tomorrow got flag raising and a su zhou de gurl come our class study wif us.. hmm.. wish me luck in flag-raising and i guess our class would welcome e gurl wif *warm hearts*!

...

yawns. another dae passed. mondae blues i guess. lol!~ morning woke up almost sleep back again as usual. went to sch extremly earlier den usual!! n guess wat! me n huiyi realized we forgot to wear pe shirt wen we in school. aiya.. but heck de.. cos its not mr kok. Lol.. haii. dammit lor.. durin chinese lessons mdm koh annouced those hu fail e chi spelling mus retake mar.. n i was in it.. wth! sarah not in it. she copied royden one n yeong yuan one so easily mah.. den wen i ask her like let me c or wat.. she jus like put in in e centre. aiya.. i noe i should hav intergrity mah.. in e end i din copiee a ting lor. its like wth? hu can c wen e ppr so far awae. i got tell her e ppr too far awae.. i donno lor.. maybe is cos she din catch wat i was tryin 2 say or wat lor.. nvm nvm.. its my fault, i hav poor eyesight u could sae. its not her fault i guess. whee~ haii.. den last time i let her c my answers mah.. den wen she cannot c my answer she like sort of angry me.. seriously wth is dis? she can be angry wif me.. n i can't? whee. life rules. haha~ i totally give up on wat i wanna express 2 ppl ardy i guess. oh ya.. n morning duty 2day was great. e mdm liew or wateva her name is not there. hola! it was mr andy wong doin e latecomin duty wif e councillors instead. at least he much more better lar. he don anyhow blame blame e councillors for anyting not like dat idiot arse mdm liew. =/ haha..! :x den went on to pe. it was fine in fact. mr wee din sae a ting bout me n huiyi. Lol.. i played badminton wif vera in my uniform anyway.. den wen comin dwn wif sarah i ALWAYS c hj sia.. he forever peepin at sarah. lol! like wat onli huh!~ after pe was finally RECCESS. fast forward on dat part. after reccess we had sci. electricity again. wonder if we will ever have dis experiment to test wat will happen if we get electrified. i will be pleased to do dat experiment i guess =) ipw mrs koh nvr come.. donno wat she wan sia! we missed 2 ipw lessons liao she still nvr come. luckily mr low say our grp wif him oso jus for 2dae. grpin wif chris aiman n sarah is fun sia. will nvr get bored one! hmm.. sth else is bout 2 emerge. mich seems 2 be pullin sarah into her "gang" of fren who consist of ping hwee they all as u may noe. n frm some sources i heard mich's gang don like me as they sae i'm a bytch? woah.. 1st time i hear got ppl tink i bytch.. fun sia~ n sarah tells me she don wanna join mich they all.. well frm my pov. obviously mich n her frens lurv sarah or so i tot. at times i don wanna stand near her too. later ppl start sayin i bytch wen they c me again mah.. somemore wif e gal they all like more n as a fren.. rather den me.. a bytch huh? haha. so hu cares? at least mich not pullin me 2 her grp of fren. her frens r oni interested in her aniwae. i don care less. life jus simply rocks BIG TIME. wHee..!!! even if mich does tries 2 make me get along wif her fren or wat? does dat chg their opinion dat i m a bytch? let em continue tinkin dat den. i will definitely NEVER chg myself jus 2 get along wif her frens. i'm hu i am. don ever try 2 chg me? hah. theres dis quote which i relli fall in love wif.. shall type it here. "when you stop talking from your heart, thats the end of a friendship" ian't dat quote NICE? haha.. its created by syu! =D donno lor.. maybe dat quote jus speaks a lot bout me. =) whee. oh ya.. hose readin my blog rmb 2 go n view weipin's blog too? theres a idiot there postin nonsence at his tagboard.. n he wrote some stuffs 2 scold e person. jus go n take a look yea? peace. =D

haha~

haha.. just felt like posting dis foto. cos its nice? =D

=s

just realized wat i wrote earlier on was more about ytd den 2day. okie.. so now i begin about writin wat i did 2dae. so mostly i was rotting awae in front of my comp n chinese books. chatted a while wif lottas ppl in msn. hmm.. den made a promise wif zy dat i'll treat him swensons 10 yrs later on 15th July 2014. cool huh! haha.. i'm still doin my chinese hwk. and can't believed i actually cut myself using penknife. not pain one lar.. jus cut 4 fun one.. no blood oso. n i kinda worried for michelle.. shes like got some "illness". donno lar.. maybe not exactly. i donno how 2 sae. haii.. she should take care lar. don keep thinkin of her beloved ones. ((laff out loud))

ello

beautiful sundae i guess. hah.. wat a dae 2 start wif.. its 1pm. i haben even bathe yet! haii.. well.. mich sarah n wp dey all gonna go out to celebrate tz's bdae. but how come i don feel any enthusiam in goin out wif em anymore? yea. not anymore perhaps. nothin personal, jus a chg of feeling. ytd should hav stormed off myself wen mich said she don wanna go home yet. i noe she wanted 2 play bball wif tz or watsoeva. at least giv me a reason nxt time. dou i could hav felt like an idiot waitin there till 6pm for all of em. in e process of waiting peter sat there oso.. n i guess he could made a pretty good fren huh? he told me i looked like miss tan conductor =.= if i had long hair look more like. den i was like so sian diao.. where got look like miss tan sia.. somemore i don like miss tan.. lol. n he n i were observin e small boi play wif his soccer ball.. e small boi so cute one.. he keep kickin e ball up into e sky, if i wasn't wearin skirt i would hav joined e small kid play instead. i rmbed how i used 2 kick wateva balls up into 2 sky.. still tink dat its waee fun! den wen mich n e rest finally stopped playin bball.. or so i thought.. they wasted time.. lottas time. n e ting which made me most infuriated was dat wen they were all standin there n talkin.. n den i was like askin mich can go liao anot.. cos in e 1st place she said she promise 2 go by 6.00pm? yet.. i waited 4 her till 6.10pm or sth.. n i din sae a ting yet.. den wen she was bout 2 go.. all of em had 2 waste time.. on wp's hair. which was like.. haii.. n now.. get 2 e point y i was angry.. i told n asked mich.. in a tone dat was loud enuff 2 be heard of cos. yet she.. ignored me. i was seriously pissed by ppl hu those dat yar? i mean.. if she had no intention of goin home wif me at all.. y cant she tell me directly. i don really blame her or wat. maybe its my fault.. well.. its owaes my fault k ppl? nobody ever blames themselves or wateva.. n i'm sure no 1 ever blames dat person 4 anyting too. shes 2 perfect? ha ha ha. whee! shes e best yar? i relli donno. i don wan anyone to noe me.. yea.. n i realized i m startin 2 hate ppl hu makes ppl like them.. like dat person. i donno wats wrong now.. maybe its jus me or wat huh? haii.. hey i noe i'm not dat likable or wateva. e gal other den me was owaes e one.. i donno wat 2 sae. certainly not jealousy. jus tired of e whole lot of ppl. i knew mich owaes prefered her better den me as a fren lar.. i no remarks 2 dat lor.. cos i don care bout it a lot. so maybe e whole ting dat happened ytd left me wif a conclusion. *((my own conclusion))* i'm not gonna post it here of cos. but it'll be related wif e whole big picture later. haii.

haii

hey people.. i donno wat 2 say lar. wrote more den 2000words den dis blardy ting hafta haf some s2pid problems.. = haii. i guess i sux.

wah!

todae very freaking tired leh =| hOw hOw.. dis few daes all not enuff slp lor. wth~! todae many things happen. Okie.. startin frm mornin, i came 2 sch quite early.. den prepare e flags! n den morning assembly. haii! me n huiyi wanted 2 back out frm flag-raising one u noe.. how nervous we were wen we standin there lor.. like e leg n hand trembling oso! hen kong bu! but 2 bad lor. every wednesday HAFTA do flag raising. its our dutiee. =(~ den i so retarded while pullin e cch flag lor.. anyway its cch.. so kinda like nvm huh.. i was so blardieex slow! =| a lot of ppl told me dat lar.. n den recess dutieex oso mus do classroom block level 2.. which is e 3/1 - 3/3 e classes mah.. den we like scared they will defy us or sth la.. but suprisingly they kinda obeyed?? xD Haha.. rubbish de lor.. den stayed back wif sarah 2 do e sickenin chinese culture poster or wat lor.. den do until.. okie okie la, but den still haben rite in e main title of e poster! lol~ i drew e lanterns n all e stuffs u NOE! =p den sarah color most of e poster.. but of cos i did color too! =p tomorrow will be havin science test sia.. =( *((haii))* sian =| but is on chapt 7 n 8 which is erm.. sorta easy? =x haha! yup.. n bout e flag tingy, a lot of ppl ask me bout e flag lor.. =| haha.. make me so ps =.= cos i raise like SAI la. hahaha! n wp din come 2 sch! he missed everyting! =s after my flag raising he sms me lor, i actually don wanna replie de.. but izzit relli so bad as in.. wateva sms he sen.. don reply a single meh? den sarah told me bout he flirtin wif her wat sai.. not in a sense like i'll care? but hate those kinda ppl lor.. make me don wanna "contact" him even more sia =s in e end i replied 2 of e sms oni.. den he sen 2 back but i jus delete it liao.. no reply le.. m i bad or wat? haa.. i siao liao la.. sleeping cells r goin up my brain =]

aHhHhHhHx

aHhHhHhHx! stress sia!!! i done finish my chinese n science.. but math..? Haix =x e graph tingy la.. i asked a lot of classmates.. they all donno how 2 do oso! cham liao.. donno wats wrong wif our math! sai sia! =s math relli jialat liao.. so i go n ask zy 2 teach me again. Haha.. last time i oso always ask him teach me algebra one.. hopefully he can successfully teach me graph? =\ went kfc for dinner wif wp zhen hao n mich~ so farnie sia! wp nvr go church b4.. den he tok 2 us bout churchs n he sae e stuffs until very funny. Like so sua ku liddat =s haiyo.. i'm so blur leh =s tomorrow mus still go rehearsel 3.45pm den start till 6pm! no choice la.. cos tuesday is e investiture liao.. saw e memorie lane video.. so touchin =x relli.. show e stuffs we did all along durin e times we spent in e council board.. omg!! i scared i panic leh! cos i relli donno a single sh!t bout e math hwk! =| hais.. huiyi n teng n clement oso donno how 2 do e idiot math! hOw hOw hOw! =s *((blur blur))* listenin 2 radio wif my headset now.. wanna blast my ears wif it.. dats how i relieve stress. Lol.. don copiee me.. =x not good 4 our ears anywae.. but i don care. hai!!!

=|

very fed-up.. 1stly wif dis blog. i did e blinkies 4 my name one.. den donno wat happen.. donno y its gone =( *((sob))* realli hungry now. Huiyi called me earlier n told me bout e math hwk which i totally 4got bout. N i gradually rmbed dat theres sci n chinese hwk too. =| hais! jus agreed 2 meet wif michelle n weipin to go eat dinner at 6pm. gonna crash my head wif homeworks now.. Hah! he smsed me, i totally jus deleted it! i still feel its kinda wrong 2 do dis =| but i relli hate ppl like him lor. no choice, blame it on his kinda character =s michelle opened a new blog.. donno why she name it as bitchy_slut anyway.. hais.. *((runs off 2 do hwk))*

omg

omg omg omg.. s2pid de leh blogger! i do e template until so xin ku den ish like suddenly got sth wrong wif e whole blog tingy.. wen i open e url.. oni a box n some of e pics in it loads.. den e rest of e contents not there!!! ah! wth! NO.. sux man

zzz..

eLLo. =x don wanna start my blog wif a "haix" word there again like yesterdae i guess. Lol! had band n e councillor investiture rehearsel. Hopes everythin goes on well on dis Tues.. we prac hard fot it i guess. haha! we had many trials of e presentation of badges n stuffs.. pretendin ms chitra 2 be mrs tan, den bowin at e center! woke up at 6am jus 2 get 2 sch by 7.10am.. =s wif sarah, michelle, natalie, zhen hao n weipin. Hah.. but i had 2 leave em 4 my councillor rehearsel.. *sob* st least i did not hav 2 run 5rounds around e basketball court. Its e new rule.. every saturday b4 band starts.. 5 rounds around basketball court! haish =| its meant 4 us 2 play louder n better after runnin.. but i seriously doubt so. lol! cute emotion huh! =p after band went eatin wif e band members as usual. Mich said her friends asked her 2 meet em at cwp. But she told em she rather eat lunch wif us *((so touched!))* haha.. n nat spotted her friends at food court. in e end.. mich had 2 stand there n let one of her friends see her =.= haix.. after eating! went 2 e "ai de ling yu" aka e dark dark place to sit n tok lor.. mostly about mich n her hk tz.. 2day diao e tz. zzz.. he said "get ur arse out of e music room" cos me nat sarah were inside.. not even makin a single blardy noise behind n he said dat 2 us.. if theres 1 ting ppl had 2 noe i dislike is passin such rude s2pid rubbish comments. :D dats y i'm so pissed at tz dat i diao directly at him. Hah.. seldom c me doin dat in band lor.. donno y =s but hate e attitude of ppl liddat. Makes me wanna box em.. or jus kick em outta e universe! haha.. n so e new sec 2 librarian is jeremy. e committee meetin was about dat lor.. n eugene so like wat only.. go n say zhen hao n weipin, make em all so terribly bu shuang at him. N can u imagine.. its li bing hu said "ppl like wp wif attitude problem" dat phrase? hai.. den afternoon wen we were at foodcourt wp go diaon li bing lor.. shuang liao lor. Now all e sec 4 seniors not happy wif e ncos.. zzz! tired seh.. wen i got home, had dis headache which keeps goin on 4 ages.. make me so chan =(~ den took a long long nap frm 4pm.. till 7pm..! 2nite no need slp ardy. Haha, wonder hu can pei me online chat or play games till late late =x *yawns*

haha.. quizy! =p

You Are An Intro-Extrovert! Sometimes you're social - sometimes you're shy You've got a bit of an Introvert / Extrovert split going on You enjoy all sorts of situations. Parties, small groups, and alone time. Too much of one, and you'll long for the other. You need varity! Chances are, you've got both serious and fun friends - and they don't get along. Are You An Extrovert or Introvert? Take This Quiz :-) Find the Love of Your Life (and More Love Quizzes) at Your New Romance.

dis blog.. zzz

HEY.. dis blog is meant 2 be a private 1 leh. Even my damn closest fren donno dis blog k.. Aldou i din put it as a private blog.. =s wen i add e tag/zonkboard.. i realize dat theres actually ppl hu got read dis bloggiex.. =s haish! =( how come liddat de.. mayb i go n create 1 more secret blog dat ppl SURE wun find out sia =s haha =p hmm.. 2day chaotic dae. Imagine a boy writin in his math exercise book e gal's name dat he love most? =| yea.. we saw k's notebook 2day.. den there was my very e good fren v name there.. wif heart shapes n ya noe dose sorta stuffs. e 1st reaction we had on us was "OMG" lol.. din expect k 2 be in lurve wif v until so.. power liao~ haha. yea.. but i feel like tellin k another ting.. v isn't dat happy wen she saw ur notebook. Shes even more "angry" n not happy.. cos. e truth hurts. but she don likes k. yea..! i noe he'll be dead serious sad sia if he noe dis. Cos frm wat i c.. i noe he likes her a lot mah but lurve cannt be force huh.. *gettin old-fashioned here* lol! i'll stop sayin bout k n v liao.. =s haiyo.. km im me ask me 4 e $8 n cdrw.. feel so blardy stressed.. 2 many tings 2 do.. -.-'' tomorrow actually got band.. but no need go liao! (rejoice!) cos needa run 5 rounds e bball court! FREAK! =x n my leg so pain like siaoo.. wen laffin in class stomach can pain sia.. lolol. especially wen u're sittin beside sarah wah in class huh.. which ish ME.. pOOr me.. =x lalala.. jk! =p i'm still havin e fear of ppl readin wat i'm typin here.. cos its kinda.. personal.. 4 some of e stuffs. *haix* Mich arh.. again got conflict wif rah.. n den rah suspect mich impose as her 2 chat wif some guy.. n e guy even call mich "dear, darlingx" etc. =s weird weird one.. den ish like.. rah keep suspectin n very worried she relli did dat lor. i noe rah shouldn't suspect her fren liddat oso la.. cos mich is kinda 1 of her best frens 2 mah.. they trust each other a lot. Den go round suspect dis dat.. friends don relli do dat =| haix =s no comments bout dis incident.. n i'm relli happy 2 get along wif e friends i used 2 not get along dat well in sec 1 lor.. like yy.. n christian! so fun huh.. but definitely not FLIRT. hate flirts alrite? lol. Last tim estill rmb i hate yy like sIaO onli. Now ok ok liao la.. i feel his character even better den zhuen lor. action kia. sorri 2 say zhuen dat but i'm startin 2 had enuff of his f**kin idioticness n actness.. gettin on my nerves sia. 1day i will relli tok/scold him bout his s2pid attitude. 2day oso.. he keep tellin rah she'll get sack frm band wat nonsence cos she somehow made spoil e clement flute.. but its because clement was sort of pullin his own flute oso.. den zhuen say wan tell mdm mathews wat sai. den she'll get sacked.. he himself always take trumpet flute oboe.. wat sai oso take come play.. den he should've get sack long time ago oso wat.. s2pid lor him.. zzz.. nxt time wan tok pls make more sense in ur tokin.. sometimes i was wonderin dat time he wanted 2 quit band.. msyb sgould hav let him quit. den there'll be no bassoonist. But hu givs a damn. zzz.. hate all dese action kias n crticizers. Criticize other ppl jsu cos they tink they can play well.. hate dis sorta lame idiots.

feel like dyin

Haha.. yea! i am feelin so like dyin! =s haix~ 2day life ish e same.. except 4 e s2pid 2.4km test.. at least i pass.. lol! if i had 2 fail n retake e test i will GO N DIE. den somemore after 2.4km test.. we needa study in class.. tried our best 2 pay attention in class.. n e worse ting 4 me ish.. i still needa stay back 4 councillor meetin after sch.. which oni starts at 3.45pm.. make us wait so long 4 nothin? zzz. now doin history worksheet.. legs n backbone so freakin pain.. PAIN leh.. i jus now go slp hor.. jus lie dwn on e bed.. back pain like siao ardy. Lol. Haix.. 9 conversation in msn now.. i was wonderin.. since i had kinda "quit" gb.. can i quit "msn" too? i mean.. i feel dat msn ish veri fan now.. haha! cryin now.. eyes so drowsy.. n slpy!! 2day i sort of duLan mich lor. I mean.. haix.. i seldom bu shuang ppl 4 nothin de k.. dats y wen i dl wif her.. she kinda like xia dao. zzz.. she wanted 2 demo 2 me how her fren beat her mah.. den she did exactly how her fren beat her 2 me lor. den was like of cos pain la.. somemore on my left hand.. which was like.. damnpainful liao cos of some blardy injury last time.. i damn dl lor.. feel so fcuk up =s zzz... haix~.. don mean 2 scold bad word. But feelin so damn stressful dis few days. n zj keep sayin me n blue now lor.. somemore her voice can be so damn loud.. like wth.. cos i don like him mah. den he hear wat zj tink go tink wrong den i cham liao la? zzz!` so damn freakin s2pid tired n sian diao day huh.. haish

hey! =)

listenin 2 perfect 10 again.. 2day morning guess wat happen? 1st time i liddat! =x i saw e wrong bus number.. n got on e wrong bus.. 4 me =x cos i donno how 2 walk 2 sch frm dat location! lol.. n i got lost! in e end is wp mich n sarah sort of "save" me! c0s i panic mah.. imagine me bein late on my own latecomin duty wen i'm a councillor? haha.. wth! =x den 2day e PFT(physical fitness test) like wat only.. almost e same as last yr la.. oni dat dis yr i partner huiyi in everyting instead of vera~ cos she different grp frm us =( sOb! =x today mr desmond goh so funny sia.. in math lesson can purposely tell us a mistake.. den we sort of "bu shuang" him anyhow bluff our class.. n den he said "u all angry liao huh" Den e whole class was like "YAH" 2 him.. LOL.. wat only huh!? he damn.. HAHA~ donno how 2 describe! n den my hand hurt again! e same injured place.. den was like~ i jus finish all 5 stations.. n very pain wor!!! sai.. w/o u~ where do i belong~ w/o u how can i go on.. *opps* over engrossed in e song without you byu clay n kimberly! hee~ all american idols 2 ME! den mich 2day like sad sad. n her fren huh.. so s2pid kia.. =x anyhow go n beat her?! wth lor?! i noe shes in nt.. but she doesn't behave like an nt student! shes like an express 2 us oso lor.. den her real nt fren go n bully her liddat.. s2pid sia! hmm.. did finish my chinese zuo ye.. tink i'm gonna do history ws liao! whee! =x history RAWK! =x relli huh.. on friday wen got history lessons.. i can pay FULL attention 2 mrs lee teach de! n hor.. recess mus go earlier cos got duty.. heck care! i wan listen 2 history lessons! ^o^ hOhO! =p tml gonna be a even tired day~ Haixxx =( blue 2day sms me. i didn't wan 2 reply him de lor! cannot control my own hands? lol! i mus reply de.. WHY!? i relli tryin not 2 reply him liao lor.. very difficult.. if only he can jus STOP smsin me den good liao mah. he say he kinda like or miss zj.. but den wat he jus don wanna like her.. crap lor! feel like slappin him =.= like some1 is like de lor. how can choose "wanna like or not de" s2pid crappy rubbish logic! =s haix..

The reasOn.

haix =( i'm sad everyday i guess. came h0me late n den m0ther nag n %^&*$# me lor. fark sia.. zzz.. den 2day band.. n0t bad l0r.. quite enj0yable. c0s is mr er teachin.. den he damn funny. but e c0mments he pass 2 my seni0r damn hurtful. he t0ld her dat "shes h0peless" i alm0st wan sh0ut him back sia. like wtf l0r. even if hes 0ur c0nduct0r he can liddat anyh0w say ppl until sh0 bad? zZz.. den 2day band mah. n clarinet secti0n which is mah secti0n need 2 clear up e band r00m.. its 0ur turn as u c ^-^ which is kinda sian.. c0s i was damn tired lia0 l0r.. sh0 many tings 2 d0.. yet sh0 little time.. =s haix.. n den i was helpin 2 stack chairs mah. Den Blue suddenly appear n like help me stack m0re chairs n help me take everyting in e st0rer00m. ald0u i still treat him quite distant la.. d0nn0 y 0s0.. mayb me 2 da0 2 alm0st every0ne l0r.. c0s its like.. =S i can walk pass a pers0n hu i seems "cl0se" 2 w/0 even l0okin at e pers0n n i can relli pretend i d0nn0 e pers0n in my entire life. Heez. Dats mah attitude huh? bleah. =x he t0ld me he like me b4. but s0 wat. as l0ng as i tink hes a flirt. n0thin can relli chg my 0pini0n l0r. n i saw him kinda "flirt" wif another of my seni0r. gr0ss sia! d0n ever c0me near me c0s flirts jus sux. aha! listenin 2 perfect 10. sIan.. 2day durin assembly needa sing e sch s0ng 2 time c0s sec 2 sing 2 s0ft. verri lame sia.. lol. n i hav an0ther ting 2 ann0unce! l0ve hurts! haha =x LAMeO me! my best fren~ dis time she relli sad huh.. she cryin sia =s haix.. she likes hk. n den she waited 4 hk b0ut 1 yr or m0re lia0 l0r. n n0w she realizes she likes lt. she t0ld me hk was very happy wen he realizes she likes lt. i kinda understand her feelin.. d0u i nvr experience b4 larh.. i mean.. damn sad l0r liddat. where g0t a guy dat u like treat u s0 freakin badly. Hah.. haix~ n0thin else 2 p0st sia.. =( zzz

a vOice within

drawin my freakin p0ster. hais` wat ish dis man? d0n tell me dis ish life. dis ish crap. crappin me 0uuta' my life. my n0rmal life. n i still got a rep0rt t0 ritex. wtf? =s Hais` i almost missed "him" jus n0w wen i was 0utside wif mich n sarah. c0s wh0le day, he din even c0ntact me! i feel s0 bu xi guan in a way or s0 l0r. Hais` still drawin e b0rder f0r my p0ster n0w. Jus n0w went 2 e new machines in e print club n t00k fotos wif mich n sarah. n0 0ffence.. but mich is gettin bitchier. seri0us man. wats g0tten in2 her. i d0n even n0e. she jus.. chged. e p0se she made wen takin e f0t0s were like 0mG l0r. she reb0nded her hair. n w9re a skirt t00. chi0 bu~ l0l` tz n hk sh0uld appreciate her l0r =s h0h0 =x i'm s0 damn lucky dat n0 0ne n0es dat dis bl0g 0f mine exist. deres 2 many 0f my deepest feelings n thinkings expressed in dis bl0g. hais` g0nna upl0ad mah ne0prints in dis bl0g 0ne 0f dis days. n0thin else i guess. listenin 2 a v0ice within by christina again. Dat s0ng jus sh00x describe myself. Lurve dat s0ng 4ever. =\ niteez.

till i get over you - michelle branch

Ha|x.. b0rin dae 2 start wif again 2day. Its 11.01am. I'm supp0sed 2 meet sarah n michelle at cwp breadt0k by 2pm. s|gh~ s2pid chinese pr0ject larx.. idi0t 0ne. n guess wat time i w0ke up 2day? 8.30am. WTH? i c0uld've swear i can slp much longer den dat. Thanks 2 my sis. Real THANKS 2 her. Haix.. =( my ss n father can actually be inside t0kin n t0kin while every1 was sleepin! crappiex. ass man. zzz! den n0w i feel sleepy c0s` of their freakin t0ks jus now in e room. Fcuk lor. i alm0st scold a swear word at my sis. But in fr0nt of my parents h0w 2 scold. So i'll sc0ld in mah bl0g instead. My sis sUx. fcuk! scuks! idi0t. Damn arse. n0thin else i guess.. Haix. I'm g0ne. will rite again 2nite.

feel like cryin

d0n ask me why. Jus tell me why. I feel s0 sad! hmm.. c0s i tink.. c0s.. Haix~ c0s 0f him. yea him. hate ppl hu lies.. realli hate em! HATE em 2 e c0re. freaks of natures. haha.. made me tink 0f dat day we went 2 syf. Havin a st0machache n0w.. s0b s0b.. p00rx meeex =s Haix.. mich jus t0ld me b0ut vien.a say she reb0nd n0 big deal. liew.. vien tink she wat? big huh.. anyh0w 0nli la she.. s2pid sia! i'm relli dr0wned n0w. u n0e war my good-o-bl0g? dis aftern00n i actually realli dreamt dat i fall.. in2 a pit.. a deep n never-endin pit.. wen i w0ke up, i alm0st cried. Whats dis supp0se 2 mean? its seri0us s2pid.. n ytd nite.. i dreamt of him f0ll0win me everywhere i go.. make me feel s0 erm.. freakin weird!!! music is meant 2 enj0y. n0t t0 sh0w off- rui rong. I even put as my nick sia.. hey.. its funnie dat i can s0metimes relli chat.. chat our hearts 0ut wif ppl dat i was not dat cl0se wif.. i rmbed h0w zy t0ld me b0ut e gal he like n l0ttas' tings.. n 0f c0s i t0ld him s0me stuffs b0ut e guy i like lar! den i gav him l0ts of advice t00! me ish sh00 g00d huh! -off-

okok.. me again

let me c0ntinue my p0st 4 2day. I p0sted e lyrics of dat s0ng.. damn nice. N e w0rds r s0o meaningful! Haix. I t0ld rui r0ng, wen i t0k crap.. i d0n usually enj0y it much. Hah.. weird0 me. Guess wat..?! i n0e an0ther piece of news. Zhi jun likes bryan. She realli d0es.. i h0pe.. they 2 can 2gether l0rx.. =p hee. I'm bad.. i can actually p0st a secret in mah bl0g? h0w niceeex of me? zhi jun damn cute sia. She keep denyin! like wat 0nly seh.. n she tries 2 tell me dat she n0 l0nger likes him. Which i tink of as crap? l0lx! n i'm dr0wned. dr0wned by m endless th0ughts n weirdness! HAH~ chatted wif bryan n zhi jun crappp n crappp. Zhi jun say make wat s2piddd m0vie bout me bein dr0wned n bryan c0me save me. which w0uld be imp0ssible. c0s 1stly, i can swim =) 2ndly, i d0n hafta be saved by him? understand? hahazz,., =x practised my clarinet m0st of e day c0s i d0n attend church. unlike my m0ther n sistax. i used 2 attend. but.. i guess i ch0se 2 be a free-tinker rite n0w. HEY i've my freed0m! =D Haix.. i feel sad? why.. its definitely N0T m00d swings. Den wat is it? a br0ken heart? =(~~~

sunday* haix. b0rin`

heyoo.. bl0gger! i jus g0t 2 n0e sth. Whats e 0ther meanin of l0l.. it means laziness 0f lunatics, i n0e its kinda crap. Rui r0ng t0ld me 1 wat.. =s w0nderin n w0nderin b0ut l0ttas' simple tings.. s2pid stuffs~ Haiz~ Theres a s0ng which is realli nice. N i w0nder whether it actually described a little of me 2. I'm g0nna post e lyrics here n0w.

The voice within - Christina Aguilera

Young girl, don't cry
I'll be right here when your world starts to fall
Young girl, it's all right
Your tears will dry, you'll soon be free to fly

When you're safe inside your room you tend to dream
Of a place where nothing's harder than it seems
No one ever wants or bothers to explain
Of the heartache life can bring and what it means

When there's no one else
Look inside yourself
Like your oldest friend
Just trust the voice within
Then you'll find the strength
That will guide your way
If you will learn to begin
To trust the voice within

Young girl, don't hide
You'll never change if you just run away
Young girl, just hold tight
And soon you're gonna see your brighter day

Now in a world where innocence is quickly claimed
It's so hard to stand your ground when you're so afraid
No one reaches out a hand for you to hold
When you're lost outside look inside to your soul
When there's no one else
Look inside yourself
Like your oldest friend
Just trust the voice within
Then you'll find the strength
That will guide your way
If you will learn to begin
To trust the voice within Yeah...
Life is a journey
It can take you anywhere you choose to go
As long as you're learning
You'll find all you'll ever need to know

You'll make it
You'll make it
Just don't go forsaking yourself
No one can stop you
You know that I'm talking to you

When there's no one else
Look inside yourself
Like your oldest friend
Just trust the voice within
Then you'll find the strength
That will guide your way
If you will learn to begin
To trust the voice within Young girl don't cry
I'll be right here when your world starts to fall

whee! syf openin.. =p

here writin my blog again.. Tings seems pretty weird nowadays. Perhaps dis could be my personal diary ya? den no 1 would noe bout dis webbie ^-^ 2day morning went 2 band! life was definitely as normal! played blue ridge saga! n it was damn niceee! heez~ realli yeap! donno y.. i feel` like.. i jus wanna be left alone n quiet 4 a while.. jus doin stuffs dat i realli like.. which would be+++* readin storybooks! Dats not realli "me" in sch.. I appear 2 be a gal hu likes fun onli..! Jus fun?! not realli. unless u realli noe me.. hu could ever c hu is e real me. hah~ =x no 1 ever sees me as a person whus realli in2 books n stuffs like writin! Kinda s2piddd! whu cares anyway? 11.33pm now. whee~ jus got home frm e syf festival or sth! realli power sia e tajong katong military band! They can even SPIN their instrument lor?! wth!~ x= crazee man! if their instrument drop den it'll be gone-case! but e bands were all realli good! n mr surapol was actually 1 of e judges! long time no c him le! our ex-conductor! he ROCKS~ lol! n e drum major of tkss.. wow.. was omggg! SHUAI~ =p behaving like a "hua chi" now sia! s2pid.. parents keep askin me go slp. Don they ever noe ppl like me wun slp so EARLY? freakin sia.. anyway tml is sunday.. i can wake up at 1pm n no 1 would giv a damn.. haix. feelin kinda sore.. even dou i had enjoyed a lot wif e zhen hao, weipin, sarah n mich! e sexy gurl! shes like woah! can pose like a professional wor! we all were amazed okie! hah! den we were like at e mosqe burger[donno how 2 spell] posing n posing.. pose innnocent face! slutty~ bitchy! haha.. all zhen hao's ideas =x n even act cute 1 oso got.. all e fotos r stored in mich's n wp's hp! all e memories. Jus gone. lol.. i mus be gettin freakin weird rite now. Haha.. i wonder.. even if i did giv some1 read my blog. Would they even understand wth i'm typin? bleah.I'm nuts. tired. Jus wanna shut my eyes n disappear frm e world n worries can be ERASED. =D but definitely none of dis can ever happened. Haix.. hate mah life at times.. Jus HATE it.. i wanan tear it AWAY! =x but theres 2 much happy memories 4 me 2 tear mah life awy. =X HAH! wth m i sayin AGAIN? NVM.. i'm gone.

freaky me... realli.. dis isn't me anymore..! =|

Hi.. here again.. now ish 11.30pm. Yawns. Life haf 2 be dis boring don it? n dat kaywen very annoyin. Realli. Cannot stand it anymore.. Wonder how he can goes around annoyin ppl like dis, sure got ppl will say him one larx! as i was sayin! band tomorrow.. donno y.. don feel so enthu in goin band anymore. Gettin serious tired dese few days. The 1st day of school reopen. And i had 2 stay back till 6pm e whole week! woah! cool huh? =/ n in e end? resulted in rushin hwk in e middle of e freakin nite. *opps* There it goes again. Somethin is chgin e way i'm tokin.. wonder wat it is anyway? my whole attitude. Yea. My attitude got prob i mus admit. The whole world does anyway. NO 1 ish perfect.. u heard wat i say? no 1 is perfect!, so mayb we jus can't blame ppl hu make mistakes don they? den 2day zhuen did it again. He always do.. he actualli dared shout at me 2 go awy huh? cos dey were donno doin wat stuffs in band.. fcuk! *cover mouth* whu he tink he ish.. some1 damn big? hes onli but a bassonist. And he had 2 TELL E WHOLE WORLD how good he ish.. n he jus wun stop his sp2id idiotic big mouth frm criticizin ppl? i wished zhuen would c dis blog 1 day. Definitely. But i doubt he'll realize hes wrongdoings. He'll jus shrug it off n pretend dat he is remorseful! N get every1's pity? den he'll start his boastin n evildoings all over again? wtf ish dis? zzz.. i'm goin off 2 bed.. nitey!

[|: first post `|]

*::hO`hO!::* its actually ages since i last blog! and its kinda weird dat i'm doin dis again! i mean.. theres much more other stuffs 2 do rather den dis.. =p hee~ alrite.. its bout.. 11.08pm.. like duh? cos tomorrow got band! =x mus side-read a new score! blue ridge saga! its nice sia! well.. clement resourceful.. he got e song liao. sO he went on sendin all band memz dat music! den i keep listnein.. clarinet so power 1 in e song.. tomorrow SurE die. *..Final++Fantasy..*